How many times have you marveled at the ability of a child to say it like it is. They just speak what they see without any judgment. They haven’t had a life time to gather up opinions of what they are seeing so they just notice, observe and say it. Just as easily as they say” look at the tree”, they say “How come he has only one arm mommy?” It is a simple observation that has no feelings attached to it or judgment, just curiosity. Then, the child is hit with a tornado of emotions as mom quickly covers her mouth and apologizes to the stranger.
Mom is filled with opinions about how this man must be suffering without his arm, it probably happened in some tragic accident, we shouldn’t talk about it. Her reactions teach that curious child that there are many feeling associated with our bodies and the way they look, especially if they are different. The children learn that as adults we don’t just see things but we form opinions of them. We never say them in public, but, we share them when the other person is around.
As adolescents, are bodies are still forming and blossoming the first time we look in the mirror and see all those opinions now being reflected in us. We see all the ways the world will talk about us in secret, and we remember what those conversations felt like. Sometimes we spend hours in front of the mirror unable to settle on one outfit because they are all being desecrated by the group of imaginary friends in your mind. The constant stream of chatter, telling you that everyone is going to laugh behind your back. Eventually some of us give up. We cant take the constant belittling and disappointment so we just separate from the process all together. We completely disconnect from our bodies because visiting them is too hurtful.
Without your attention and love the body slowly dies. Sitting at the center of it all is a beautiful, pure, loving heart, that is crying out to you to come home. We all need love to survive, if your hearts cries go unanswered long enough it may give up the fight. Without the heart, the other organs have nothing to live for and they start their slow decline to death. When the body stops being able to get you through your daily routine, and fighting through the pain as your body is crying for help becomes unbearable, you momentarily return to your body. You visit a doctor who guides you to explore the different parts of you, describing the pains and together you try to figure out what’s going on. This is like giving your vital organs a pep talk in moments of desperation.
Just you showing up for them and responding to their cries of pain, says you care. Like the day the doctor announces you that you have terminal cancer or diabetes. That day you cry out “I don’t want to die, I want to live.” your heart suddenly flourishes and you are able to move towards healing. But, soon you forget. You get settled back into your new life with your new expectations, medications to numb the pain and mute the cries of the body, and once again you separate. It is hard to be in a body that you have so many negative opinions circling around your mind about. You see failure and disappointment and it feels easier to run. The whole vicious circle starts back up. Everyday wake up and cry out “I want to live!! I want to be healthy and vibrant!!”
Think of your body as belonging to a small child. A child cannot survive on nourishment alone. The child needs love to flourish! Look at your toes and love them unconditionally, just like you would the toes of a baby. Move through each part of your body with this desire to accept and love each part of you and see your body as absolutely perfect exactly as it is! As you arrive to your heart forgive yourself for not being there for you! See all of your quirks as loveable, all those moments you may have acted out of anger or frustration as times you were searching for more love and start to give yourself that love now. Love all those parts of you that you deem imperfections, they need you the most and watch your whole life begin to change. Health, happiness, joy, love and bliss all start with you!! Now get to work!